Miss World


Words & Music: Jake Thackray

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Breasts and thighs that hypnotise me,
Galvanise me, so agonisingly,
But such a size that, not surprisingly,
She can hardly move at all.

These are the queens of the Earth,
Deserving our reverence, our homage.
Miss Isles of Scilly, Miss Central Chile,
Miss Dogger Bank, Miss West Bromwich.
And we guarantee the display
Will dispel all male melancholia,
You'll see so much of Miss Ran of Kutch,
Not to mention Miss Inner Mongolia.

B-b-b-breasts and thighs that hypnotise me,
G-galvanise me, so agonisingly,
But such a size that, not surprisingly
She can hardly move at all.

Miss South Rhodesia is here,
You'll see she's a shade or two lighter.
She's awful keen to keep her party clean
And UDI washes whiter.
And what does Miss USA say?
She says that she's everyone's sister,
But she don't give a damn for Miss Vietnam
And she reckons Miss Russia's a Mr.

B-B-b-breasts and thighs that hypnotise me,
G-galvanise me, so agonisingly,
But such a size that, not surprisingly
She can hardly move at all.

There they all go in a row,
Exposing their fleshy perfections.
Their withers and their flanks, their hams and their shanks,
Open to public inspection.
But the judges are discriminating men;
This is no job for no nitwit.
They must carefully watch every cleavage and crotch
For the girl who's the world's biggest titbit.

B-B-B-Breasts and thighs that hypnotise me,
G-Galvanise me, so ago-agonisingly,
But such a size that, not surprisingly
She can hardly move at all.
Oh, she hardly moves at all.

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