Brainteaser for punctuation pedant

[Malcy]

This kind of spam punctuation is deliberate, an attempt to throw spam trapping and filtering tools off the scent. After you’ve had your 20th offer of Viagra for sale, you set up a rule in your spam filtering program to say “automatically flag and delete any e-mail with the word ‘Viagra’ in the title”. Then, they start sending the same e-mail with the ‘words’ “V1agra”, “V!agra”, “Vi@gr@” etc so your simple check for “Viagra” won’t spot it.

So, in this case, Mr Spammer has found that he’s had a lot of bounced e-mails for his mail entitled “Get a Degree Today” so he’s trying a version with punctuated words. Sneaky, eh !

[SarahW]

Oh – look what I’ve been missing!

Here’s an example I sometimes use – not funny, but shows the importance of punctuation.

The patients who complained received better treatment.
The patients, who complained, received better treatment.

The commas make the difference between ‘who complained’ being a qualifying or defining clause. OK – I never claimed to be a comedian…

[KeithD]

I, like her, walk.
Smile, for the camera’s dear.
I can’t, Cook.
Oh my – God!
There she was, at home/ There, she was at home.
Jake sometimes sang Country, boy.
Jake wrote on the shelf.
It hurts to be in, love.
That’s the touchline, judge.
That’s all! You get out of my paypacket!
He’s the teacher’s, pet.
He went cold: Turkey, without drugs?
There! I’ve done! Thirteen examples tonight.

[SJosephine]

"How. Did you spend, Christmas?" American Indian greeting a judge. (Mr Christmas Humphries in case no one’s familiar.

"How did you spend, Christmas?" The judge’s accountant making an enquiry.

"How did you spend Christmas?" Several milion people enquiring of friends they didn’t see from the 24th December.

"How? Did you? Spend. Christmas!" One sided telephone call from a person reluctant to swear.

"How did you…"
"Spend"
"Christmas….?"

Duologue between two robbers, one who wonders where his mate got all that money, the mate preferring just to get on with what money is all about. The first robber wonders if it was a festive gift…

You can do this with almost any sentence. Well, you can if you’re a writer

👿

[Author]

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