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Keiwit wrote:
Guess what type of lettuce it had in it.
Errrrrr, ket me see : Batavian, Besson Rouge, Black Seeded Simpson, Bostonbibb, Buttercrunch, Butterhead, Centennia, Cos, Crisp Head, Crisphead, Deers Tongue, Diamond Gem, Dolly, French Crisp, Grand Rapids, Great Lakes, Leaf, Little Gem, Little Red Riding Hood, Lollo Biondo, Lollo Rosso, Loma, Loose Leaf, Lovina, Merveille Des Quatre Saisons, Oak Leaf, Paris White, Perella-Red, Prize Head, Red Fire, Red Sails, Red Salad Bowl, Romaine, Rosalita, Rossimo, Rouge D’hiver, Royal Oak Leaf, Salad Bowl, Saladin, Salinas, Sangria, Simpson Elite, Summer Crisp, Tango, Tom Thumb, Victoria or Webbs Wonderful maybe ??
😛Keiwit wrote:
Pity really, cos I had lots more fruit & veg puns lined up.
That’s probably a vegetable punnet.
I love a good pun. Some of the best jokes are good puns. Recycling time:
A man entered a local paper’s pun contest. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
~~~~
A frog went into a bank and hopped up to the loan officer. The loan officer said, "Good morning. I’m John Paddywack. Can I help you?"
The frog said, "Yeah, I’d like to borrow some money".
The loan officer found this a little odd, but he got a loan form out. "First," he asked, "what’s your name?"
"Kermit Jagger," replied the frog.
"Really?" the loan officer said. "Any relation to Mick Jagger?"
"Yeah, he’s my dad," Kermit said.
The loan officer said, "Okay. Ummm … do you have any collateral?"
The frog reached into a plastic bag, pulled out a pink ceramic elephant and handed it to the loan officer. "Will this do?" he asked.
The loan officer said, "Hmmm … I’m not sure. Let me go check with the bank manager."
He went to the manager and said, "Excuse me, but there’s a frog out there named Kermit Jagger who wants to borrow some money. All he has for collateral is this pink elephant thing. I’m not even sure what it is."
The manager said: "It’s a knick-knack, Paddywack. Give the frog a loan, his old man’s a Rolling Stone."
Keith, for some reason I am contemplating the Noel Edmonds radio 1 show on Sunday mornings circa 1970. The Golden Guillotine springs to mind.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Mr. Boyd, a model railway enthusiast, spends months working on a new layout in his loft. After months spent diligently crafting a scale model of a goods yard siding at Crewe and distressing the stonework on his Airfix signal box he comes to the piece de resistance – a scratch built replica of a 1930s shunter. But horrors! his pride and joy is damaged – scratch and claw marks and there in the bottom of the box – cat fur!
Enraged, he races downstairs and, pausing only to grab a cleaver from the kitchen, goes in search of tiddles, his mother in law’s moggy and charges out into the street yelling and roaring. The neighbours call the police and he is hauled off to the nick to be charged with breach of the peace. Just as he finishes telling his tale in the interview room another officer comes in carrying a cat. Looking the prisoner straight in the eye he sings:
"Pardon me Boyd, is this the cat that chewed the choo-choo"
Post edited by: aliasmacalias, at: 2005/02/09 13:22
Keiwit wrote:
I’ve been hiding behind the very poor disguise of Keiwit for a couple of months now, it’s so cunning that no one knows what my real name is. Well it is time to finally confess that my name is Tony Blair.
I thought you were yet another Keith, Keith, and somewhere I seem to have read that your surname is Withers. Am I imagining it? Actually, I have always wanted to call you by the alternative of Peewi, for reasons which may just be fathomable – but I thought you might take offence. But anything must be better than T*** B****.
:woohoo: :woohoo: :woohoo:
Judith
Keiwit wrote:
[quote] I could get used to this weekend posting. quote]Yes, well, there’s not much of it goes on in this community. Most of the regular posters seem to prefer taking time out from work rather than from family for the sort of chat we indulge in here – and quite right too. So that leaves the weekend posters feeling rather bereft. There may be more of us though. Perhaps we will manage to lure them out if we keep it going. Your material is definitely good for leisure-time as well, I would say!
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:Judith
PS – I’ve been a guineapig fancier too in my time – but I suppose yours is as real as your cat, existing only in cyberspace.
🙁PPS – How about making a guineapig your avatar, to go with my cat?
Post edited by: Judith, at: 2005/02/13 11:52
Post edited by: Judith, at: 2005/02/13 11:57
Judith wrote:
[quote]
PPS – How about making a guineapig your avatar, to go with my cat?
I tried to add a couple of images to my last but failed, so I’ll try one here:
Sorry – I tried to send a second image but it didn’t want to travel.
Post edited by: Judith, at: 2005/02/13 12:08
Well, I’m delighted to have prompted you to produce an avatar – now you are really one of the family. Winnie-the-Pooh is a thoroughly worthy alternative to a g-pig.
😛
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